11 Paths to Peace
There is peace all around us and access to even more of it within us. One major challenge we humans face to feeling contentment is the awareness of negative newsworthy events. Through our smartphones, computers, televisions, tablets, and the radio we are constantly told stories of pain, struggle, drama, illness, war, famine, and other atrocities. We are hyper-aware of many of the most difficult situations happening across the globe. As a result, our minds are often disproportionately focused on the areas where things aren’t going well.
Over time this negativity can cause us to form negative beliefs about the world. We can start to feel dissatisfaction and lack in our lives, judge others, fear people and places. If we were to take an objective inventory of our lives, most of us would find that we have a lot of good things all around us. People, places, and things are mostly at peace at any given time during the day. I’ll bet much of your life is spent in a state of peace. I don’t just mean for all the yogis sitting on a mountain top reading this with exceptional phone service. I’m talking to YOU! As we sleep we experience this peace subconsciously and when you wake you may have a few moments of this peace before checking your phone and going about your day.
Allow me to use my morning as an example. I went on a walk to get coffee, I had planned to sit outside as I wrote this article but then my roommate wanted me to run a couple of errands so my writing time was cut short. Then as I was coming into the apartment I stepped in dog sh*t, I looked for synonyms for sh*t but crap, defecation, poop, dung, deuce, feces, feculence, fecal matter, stool and number two just didn’t get the point across the same way. Having admitted all that, I feel the pressure lifted off this article and my nine-year-old self would be laughing his head off right now reading this.
I mention this story because I could have yelled, I could have gotten angry, I could have let it stink up my whole day but instead, I chose to accept it. I went on through the day appreciating the fact that I had made my roommate's day a bit better and then pet and played with the dog who had left the excrement. Now that’s the word I should have used. Well, for the sake of showcasing radical acceptance I am going to keep writing without cleaning up the literary mess I have created so that you have the opportunity as a reader to release any judgment and find peace in the foulness of this example.
Much of our pain exists in our perception of things but there’s hope. For the remainder of this article, I want you to forget about struggles, your life plan, your beliefs of how things "ought" to be, who you “should” be, what you were “supposed” to have accomplished by now... Just be here with as much love as you can muster for yourself because you are worthy of it and the inner fulfillment that can come from these 11 Paths to Peace.
As you read this list, notice which ideas resonate with you and then you can have some fun trying them out for yourself. I would love to hear how it goes so please don’t hesitate to reach out on social media or leave a comment.
1. Starting and ending the day with appreciation- When we wake up in the morning our minds are open to new impressions so before we dive into our phone, look through texts, social media, or the news, we can allow ourselves to experience the peace of waking up in our beds and thinking about a few things we are thankful for. Allow yourself to go through a list of things that delight you. Feel the wellbeing and the goodness that comes from appreciation and then notice how your day unfolds when you have infused love into your mornings. End your day with gratitude. As you lay down to go to sleep think back over things you are grateful for that day and other things you are thankful for in life. You will carry positive thoughts and feelings into your sleep where your subconscious will continue to experience the positive frequency of those thoughts throughout the night. It’s not uncommon to wake up the next morning feeling even better than usual and even more refreshed.
2. Create “Freedom Cards”- Make a card for “Peace” by writing peace on one side of an index card with a custom mantra you create that brings you a feeling of peace. Then on the other side of the card draw an eye, ear, nose, mouth, hand, and then next to each describe what peace looks like, sounds like, smells like, tastes like… Then pick a song that brings you a feeling of peace. Play this song each day and work to memorize the card so that every time you hear that song it anchors you to the feeling of peace. Let the peace fill your body and know that you can access this feeling whenever you want. You can also make freedom cards for any feeling or trait you want to anchor in. I got this method from my friend and personal excellence coach Jen Merifield.
3. Thank your meals and be present with the experience of cooking and eating- As you feel deep gratitude for your food and fill your diet with healthy and high vibrational foods you will find that you have more energy and vitality. Eating slowly and with love in your heart fills the body and the spirit with a sense of peace.
4. Reach out to friends and loved ones- Everyone has a vibe they give off so spend more talking with those who uplift your spirit. While we aren’t always a hundred percent consistent with the energy we give off based on our emotions and state, we can become more aware. Noticing how we feel in the presence of others and making time for those who make us feel more joy. Be a person who helps others soar and give out the energy you want to receive. If you want love, give love. If you want encouragement, be encouraging. If you want to laugh, tell a joke or talk about funny things that have happened. Even if you’re terrible at telling stories, you might just be so bad at telling jokes that it’s funny.
5. Adjust your goals and keep learning- Notice ways you can work with what’s happening instead of trying to force things that aren’t working. You can try asking, what feels right for me to be pursuing right now? In what ways can I show up for others? What are some good ways I can expand my business? What is the best thing for me to do right now?
Learning from other peaceful and inspiring people by connecting with their books, podcasts, interviews, speeches, and other personal development works can bring us a state of peace.
6. The importance of rest- Sleep is an incredible way to refresh your mind and restore your sense of peace. A great way to take a nap is with a short sleep guided meditation that puts your mind at ease. Sleep, in general, is important so make sure you are getting consistent rest and the research still shows that 8 hours of sleep is ideal. A Fitbit or Apple Watch can help you track your sleep patterns and give you a more detailed report on time spent in deep REM sleep.
7. Meditation and prayer- Meditation felt like the most obvious thing to put on this. Meditation can elicit strong impulses in people, they either seem to love it or have every excuse not to do it. There are so many preconceptions when it comes to meditation but you don’t have to be a yogi on a mountain top to find the benefits of meditation. I suggest you keep it simple and have fun discovering meditation, you can start with a five minute guided meditation and build your practice from there. This is about you, it’s about how you feel and there is a type of meditation for just about everyone, you can try a walking meditation, light a nice smelling candle and focus on the flickering flame, listen to a river or a fan, do transcendental meditation, movement meditation, heck you can even listen to Matthew McConaughey guide you through one on the Calm app. I recently got the muse 2 which is a headband that tracks your brainwaves while meditating and makes it easy to track your progress. So that’s also something you can look into.
Connecting to your higher power is also a great way to feel peace wash over you. Prayer had profoundly changed my life and this practice can connect you with unconditional love that is waiting for you.
8. Getting out in nature- Breathe in the fresh air, notice sunrises if you’re up early enough, or the trees, birds, flowers, streams, squirrels, and sunsets... There is well-being all around us, as we go out in it and are aware of it we can feel our troubles melt away and become one with it.
9. Forgiveness- While spending more time with ourselves we experience more of our true essence. Yet, while diving deep we may uncover that we are holding onto a grievance. Maybe there is someone who wronged you and it’s hard to let it go. Spending time with these feelings and understanding that forgiveness frees us can help. We can feel the hurt and still see the other person through a lens of love. We can think of the pain they must have been going through to hurt us. We ease the pain and allow the healing to come in as we confront the truth of what happened.
If it's ourselves we need to forgive. Then sit with the regret and allow it to be seen in the light. Were you doing the best you could at the time? Would you handle the situation differently now? Allowing ourselves to see the progress and growth we have made through past anguish helps us to tend to the wound and forgive ourselves. Love is the force that heals us.
10. Say what you need- There are also many people finding themselves quarantined with family, people they are romantically involved with, or roommates, and this much time in close proximity can bring disagreements up. Communicate what you need and when a conflict arises notice your breath, try to maintain a state of calm, and seek first to understand where the other person is coming from.
11. Self-love shower or bath- I find that taking a shower or a bath can be a very soothing practice as well. I encourage my clients to imagine not only cleansing their bodies but their energy as well. Get a soap that’s scent calms you and wash away fear that has accumulated within. Let any negativity go down the drain. Then after you are done with your bath dry off and you can use a lotion and imagine rubbing love all over you. Feel the self-love sinking in until you are completely refreshed and feeling good. Follow up by wearing clothing that feels soft and nice against your skin.
Notice how you are feeling throughout the day by checking in with yourself and if at any moment you need some time for yourself take a break. Your peace is important and how you feel can become a priority if you make the decision. You deserve to have someone looking out for you, be that person for yourself. I have released an E-Book called “Coach Yourself” with some methods used by top life coaches to help their clients in uncovering their deepest goals and I also have a book called “The Daily Playbook” which is a mindfulness journal and planner to help you get the life you really want. These two resources can really help and if you would like further assistance you can hire a coach. I am currently taking coaching applicants.
As we connect more with each other, the world, and our essence, we get recharged by the Universe. Love is in great supply, it is here and available to you now so lean into it. Love yourself in every way you can and surround yourself with more each day until peace simply becomes your natural state.