How Life Coaches Illuminate Our Paths
Life is a journey, often filled with twists, turns, and unexpected detours. For some of us, the road has been rocky, marked by hardships and challenges that seemed insurmountable. But what if there were guides—compassionate, skilled individuals—who could help us navigate this complex terrain? Enter life coaches, those unsung heroes who illuminate our paths, helping us discover our inner strength, resilience, and purpose.
The Darkness Before Dawn
My own journey began in shadows. As a child, I was uprooted at the young age of ten from the Bay Area in Northern California to a remote and very small town in Idaho. That first year there I was sick so often my parents and doctors thought I had some disease. Eventually, after a lot of testing it was informed that I had “culture shock”. Looking back I believe it was the exact opposite, it was the lack of culture that was most challenging to my system mixed with a cold and gray winter that I had never experienced. This town I was moved to in order to be closer to my grandfather was very conservative and my creativity and softer nature wasn’t welcomed or celebrated. I forged my own path being one of the youngest students to star in a school play as Ichabod Crane in The Legend of Sleepy Hallow and I loved writing scripts and stories. I played sports too, tennis, basketball and ran cross country. Still, I was bullied relentlessly, my self-esteem eroded by cruel words and exclusion. School felt like a battleground, and I carried the weight of rejection on my young shoulders. Home wasn’t a sanctuary either; my parents worked all day and would come home and ask me how school was. When I was honest, I would hear “why didn’t you stand up for yourself?” or “Am I going to have to come down to your school again?” These were not the solutions I wanted and needed so many of my struggles I fought in silence. Then around sophomore year, my heart faltered, I regularly would go into arrhythmia. My heart would be racing and beating out of my chest out of nowhere, this led to a lot of testing and eventually required surgery—a reminder of life’s fragility.
Then, one fateful day after emails were stollen and read from my computer, I was kicked out of my home as a teen. My family and my conservative community had found out I am gay. From then on, I was left to fend for myself.
Therapy and Coaching
Therapy was my first lifeline as an adopted child. The government would check in on how I was adjusting and gave the resources for regular checkups through therapy. I learned a lot from the experience, both positive and negative. On one hand, it provided a relatively safe space to unravel my emotions, as long as my parents liked the therapist that is. When they didn’t they were quickly changed, even if I had liked the person. I didn't really feel understood by these therapists with such a large age gap and with my parents often knowing what was shared. So I often kept a lot in and never felt the level of safety and care a therapist is there to provide. Even later in life, therapists could be helpful to a point but nothing helped me more than my coaches! NOTHING! Coaching was the greatest investment of my life because coaches were real with me, they would tell me the truth. They would listen when I needed it and gave me the space to come up with my own answers but would also share from their perspective how they saw my situation something no therapist had ever done. My coaches could be inspiring while talk about their experiences, they could hold me accountable to tasks so I moved my life in the right direction and they could also support me and encourage me as friends who were building great bonds together. This was impossible for a therapist to ever be able to do. No coach ever treated me like a number, many therapists did. No coach ever ran away from their commitment, it was always clear how many sessions we had or how many months we would work together. I had therapists who would tell me they were moving away and this would be our final session together, or that they were getting into a different type of therapy and this would be their last session. It was jarring, I can’t imagine how devastating that would be for some clients to hear after you had built a relationship. Or if your insurance changed and you could no longer see your therapist. I believe the world needs coaches that have empathy and embrace their humanity. Sure they will also help you get closer to your goals but they are so much more than that when you find the right ones.
The Emergence of Life Coaches
Enter the life coach—a beacon of hope. Unlike therapists, life coaches don’t just delve into the past; they focus on the present and future. They’re not diagnosticians; they’re visionaries who help us see more clearly and shine brighter. Here’s how they create lasting change:
Clarity and Vision: Life coaches help us define our goals, aspirations, and values. They encourage us to dream big, to envision the life we desire. Like stargazers, they point us toward constellations and see the connections and possibilities.
Action Steps: Armed with clarity, we need a roadmap. Life coaches break down our dreams into actionable steps. They’re the trailblazers who say, “Take this path; it leads to your purpose.” They hold us accountable, nudging us forward.
Mindset Mastery: Our minds can be a treacherous terrain. Life coaches equip us with mental tools—affirmations, visualization, mindfulness—that transform self-doubt into self-belief. They teach us to navigate storms with resilience. As a coach myself I have so many tools for building strength and getting through losses and setbacks.
Confidence Cultivation: Life coaches help us recognize our strengths, celebrate victories (no matter how small), and rewrite our narratives. They whisper, “You’re capable of more than you know” and “I BELIEVE IN YOU!”
My Journey with a Life Coach
I met my first life coach during a pivotal moment. She saw the potential within me—the dormant gifts waiting to bloom and how my people pleaser nature was holding me back. Together, we mapped out my desires: writing a novel, healing relationships, and finding purpose. She helped as I stepped into the unknown, reminding me that setbacks were stepping stones. Now that novel is finished and will be published in less than a year.
The Transformation
Life coaching wasn’t magic; it was alchemy. Slowly, I shed old beliefs, replacing them with affirmations. I wrote my story, created abundance, took trips and did things that really scared me, and I discovered my purpose lay in helping others.
I realized that life coaches weren’t just guides; they were cosmic companions, urging me to dance through life and never let anyone or the past keep me from loving wholeheartedly.
So to wrap it up, life coaches are the expert navigators who help steer us toward our North Star. They don’t promise smooth seas, but they provide the compass. Therapy helps to heals wounds; life coaching re-ignites our inner flames and helps us go after the things that light us up. So, if you find yourself feeling a bit lost, consider this: would you rather speak about your problems again or imagine new possibilities for your life? It’s just a choice we get to make.
If you would like to schedule a session-
email me now- Kaden@KadenJames.com
Note: This article is a blend of personal experience and ideas. Life coaches vary in approach, I am not a dr. these are simply opinions I have based on my experiences. I wish you all the best on your journey.
: Disclaimer: Consult a qualified professional for personalized advice.
